7 Things You Can Do With Bacardi 151 (Because you’re not drinking that shit)

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1. Clean the Toilet

With that scorching sting and toxic finish of Bacardi 151, germs will undoubtedly melt under the fiery mouth inferno of the most powerful Bacardi distillation. If not, those germs will surely try and escape it. No living organism will willingly subject themselves to contact with such a vile substance. Either way, you’ll end up with a germ-free toilet bowl.

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2. Pull a Prank on your Worst Enemy

Take an empty bottle of Blue Label, fill it with 151. Invite your worst enemy for a drink in the guise of reconciliation. Watch and enjoy the horror in his face when he drinks the 151 with the expectation that sweet scotch will touch his lips.

3. Fight Monsters

Forget silver bullets, crosses, cloves of garlic or sunlight. If you want to battle a creature of darkness, you must fight it with a weapon forged in hell. Bacardi 151 is Sauron’s piss brewed in Hades’ cauldron and fermented with Satan’s semen. No demon will survive it.

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4. Redeem an Alcoholic

You want to get someone to stop drinking? Know someone addicted to alcohol? Well here is the solution to your problems. Make them drink a concoction so potent and rancid that even the most desperate alcoholic will be set straight.

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5. Test your True Love

Want to know for sure if somebody loves you? Pour him/her a shot of 151 and ask that person to drink it and keep a straight face. If she flees, it was never meant to be. If she drinks the shot, you know you’ve found a keeper.

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6. Explore an Alternate Dimension

This is unconfirmed, but legend has it that if you consume enough Bacardi 151, your mind will be transported to an alternate universe. 151 contains certain chemicals that will activate parts of your brain that moderates perception of reality. Drink enough of it and your brain melts and takes you to a world of Minotaurs and honest politicians.

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7. Stop Crime

Do you live in a bad neighborhood? Has the Akyat Bahay Gang wreaked havoc in your area? Well pour some Bacardi 151 around the perimeter of your house and you will never have to worry about burglars again. (Warning: this may also prevent you from leaving your house.

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